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15 reasons *not* to visit Cornwall

From disgusting delicacies, awful cliff top views, horrible beaches, boring culture and dreary heritage - we’ve compiled our top 15 reasons why *not* to visit Cornwall.

1. The seas aren't nice

Cornwall’s coastline is surrounded by crystal clear waters, turquoise seas and rolling waves. It really is as bad as it sounds.

2. The food is terrible

With delicacies like scones slathered with jam and Cornish clotted cream, local beer-battered fish and chips and piping hot pasties filled to the brim, Cornwall really has nothing to offer in the food department.

3. No one ever has any fun

From paddleboarding, coasteering, kayaking, surfing, sea swimming, cliff jumping, windsurfing and so much more on offer, it’s easy to see why no one ever has any fun here.

4. The heritage is boring

The region’s rich mining history and fascinating coastal stories are so dull. Who wants to discover the coastline’s ancient tin mines and learn about fascinating myths and legends like King Arthur’s mysterious Cornish past?

📷: Financial Times

5. The beaches are awful

We couldn’t think of anything worse than setting up camp for the day on the golden sands and award-winning beaches that make up Cornwall’s coastline. Sounds hideous. 

6. There’s nothing to do

With a huge lack of good tourist destinations, like The Eden Project, The Minack Theatre, Pendennis Castle, and The Lost Gardens of Heligan, we really wouldn’t recommend a visit down west. 

📷:Great Gardens of Cornwall

7. You won’t find a good ice cream anywhere

From the classic vanilla to the more adventurous of flavours, doused in clotted cream or even smothered in your favourite chocolate topping – the choices are endless.

With hundreds of delicious ice cream makers across the county to try, it’s a shame you won’t come across the perfect scoop here.

📷: Great British Life

8. The pubs are rubbish

Picture-perfect pubs with roaring fires, hearty grub, local brews, great views and rich atmospheres really don’t cut the mustard in the south west. Top tip: be sure to avoid The Working Boat in Falmouth, underneath our sister hotel, The Greenbank

9. There's no marine life

This little corner of the world isn’t exactly known for its bustling marine life. While you may spot some seals off the north coast, encounter a dolphin or two in Falmouth bay, run into basking sharks in the waters of Porthcurno, or even meet a humpback whale at Land’s End, you’ll be short on creatures to spot.

📷: Padstow Sea life Safaris 

10. Nothing happens here

With the likes of Mazey Day Festival, Falmouth Week, The Royal Cornwall Show and Mousehole Christmas Lights, as well as tons of music, culture and festivals throughout the year, you’ll find it difficult to fill up your diary down here.

📷: Cornwall Live

11. There’s no culture

While the region may have award-winning and world renowned galleries like the Tate St Ives, hubs for arts and culture like The Poly in Falmouth, and even incredible sculptures to marvel at in places like Tremenheere Sculpture Gardens, Cornwall isn’t exactly know for its wealth of culture. 

📷: Tate St Ives

12. It's not suitable for dogs

Don’t bring your pooch on your next trip down. They’ll hate playing on the dog friendly beaches, snoozing in welcoming pubs and exploring the county’s woodlands.

Cornwall really isn’t the place for them.

13. The shopping is rubbish

With an endless list of incredible clothing boutiques, crafters, designers and sellers, you’ll definitely find it challenging to come across some amazing boutiques and shops during your visit. 

📷: Finisterre

14. There's nowhere to explore

Spanning across the whole of the Cornish coast, the South West Coast Path follows winding clifftops, secluded spots and hidden tracks. While many love exploring this iconic coastline, we wouldn’t recommend. 

📷: Celtic Walking Trails

15. It's too hard to leave

Despite all of its faults, you’ll never want to leave.

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